Here goes nothin

I have recently been intrigued by the amount of people who have blogs. I don't know if it is done mostly for journaling purposes or if people just have the need to be heard. I have enjoyed reading a few of my friend's blogs and decided that I too have the need to be heard. So. I will type.

Now I am faced with this question. Do I advertise to my friends/family that I have a blog? OR Do I keep it quiet and use this mostly for theraputic purposes? Because this will have a huge impact on what I put on here.

I will think about that for a while. In the mean time I'll keep it light.

Naw. Forget that. I'm going to vent. Hopefully I can edit this later and take out what I don't want everyone reading.

(Inhaling.... Exhaling....)

OK. I am tired. Very tired. I am sure like every other mom with two sweet, active babies -who both need at least 75% of my attention most all of the time. It is a wonderful job that I have. I just need a break every now and then to breath. I have a sitter coming over tomorrow. I plan to do yard work since our grass hasn't been mowed all year. Right now I am running the house since my husband is so busy at work. Poor guy didn't even get lunch today. He came home for supper at 7:45 and then went back an hour and a half later. He's gone now. It feels a little like a deployment, but not because when he's deployed I don't have to wonder what time he's coming home, or hope that I will see him only to be disapointed. It is easier to be focused when you know the mission ahead -even if it is months before you will see your love again.

I guess that is something about me. I hate being disapointed. Everyone probably feels that way, so maybe that isn't an interesting fact about me. Nevermind.

I am a little bit crazy right now -no, I'm being literal. I think I have a touch of post-pardum depression. I don't feel suicidal or ANYTHING like that. What I do feel is hyper-sensitive, very emotional, needy, tired that sort of thing. Basically, any small disapointment feels like the world is falling - on me.

The good news is that I am aware. What a blessing. I am able to recognize that my thoughts are not reality and do my best to refocus my mind on Biblical truths. I am so grateful for the Holy Spirit. He seems to get the least attention of the members of the trinity, but it's hard to imagine life as a Christian without Him. Eph. 1:17 "I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the Spirit a of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better."

God is good, and I am still tired. So I'm going to bed. But, this has been good. I feel a little better already :-)